The Sacred Band
by toobeauty
Summary: Alexander and Hephaestion discovered how hard is to live apart.
1. Chapter 1

Title: The Sacred Band.

Author: toobeauty

Rating: PG-13 for the story

Pairing: Alexander/ Hephaestion.

Chapters: 1 of …….

Reviews: Please!!

No beta so all mistakes are mine.

Hope you enjoy it!!

**THE SACRED BAND.**

**CHAPTER ONE**.

One blond, one brown eye and one green, fifteen years old, stocky, short, extrovert, lively, impulsive, the Macedonian prince, a King -to-be, the Sun, Hephaestion´s lover.

The other brunette, cerulean eyes, sixteen years old, slim, tall, introvert, happy, reflexive, the Athenian first companion, a Chilliarch-to-be, the Stars, Alexander´s lover.

Nobody could understand their close relationship, they were bond to each other and even Death would have to think twice before tearing them apart, because they were the gods favourite, because they were everything for the other, because they love each other so deeply that any of them couldn't even think about living without the other, because they would follow each other without hesitation down to the house of death; because they just were Alexander and Hephaestion.

Both of them liked their military training and life, just because it allowed them to be together, enjoying each other company but especially sharing their bringing up and education. They have been together for at least seven years and they were planning to continue till death, even though Hephaestion knew he would be the first of the two to be apart due to Alexander´s duty to the kingdom. Hephaestion wanted to get the best from Alexander because he wanted to follow Aristotle teaching about male relationships based on knowledge and his true intention was not to interfere with Alexander's royal life. But Hephaestion´s life was getting a bit complicated because his feelings for Xander – the secret love nickname he used to call Alexander - were getting stronger and they were not always based on pure knowledge. Because of his inner turmoil, he was often found alone on his bed in the barracks or lying on the green grass of the furthest palace garden. He avoided everybody's company, his mood was sad and even his eyes, gates to his soul, were not so shinny and blue as they used to be. Alexander realized that something was happening to his best friend but he didn't want to force him to give an answer but his heart was in constant pain because he didn't know how to calm down his friends angst.

After some weeks of nearly not talking to each other, all their companions started to murmur about Hephaestion's condition and Ptolemy dared to ask Alexander what was going on between them, because even though they didn't know about any fight, they knew that things were not ok between them. Alexander couldn't give him a proper answer because he didn't know why His Phai – his secret love nickname – was avoiding him. Anxious zarcos eyes looked at his skylight partners but they could only catch the view of a slender back retreating and quick but light footsteps could be listened. Even King Phillip was aware of the situation because his faithful lover and general Cleitus had drawn his attention to the two depressed youths. Each took the opposite way of the other but any of them noticed the worried look of their king.

As Alexander's companions were passing by and stopped to bow in front of their king, he stopped all of them and questioned about Alexander and Hephaestion but they couldn't give a satisfactory answer and they retold him what Alexander had told them some hours before.

That night Hephaestion didn't show up for dinner and Alexander looked so sad that even his mother felt sorry for him. Olympias suspected what the problem could be because she had seen Hephaestion looking at Alexander with his eyes so full of love that they could even melt her hard and cold heart.

Alexander ate very little, excused himself and asked for permission to go back to his room, the same room he had shared with his Phai for many years but that, right in that moment, the brunette youth had left two weeks ago without giving him a true explanation.

Alexander missed his friend pacing around before going to sleep, he missed his friend´s messy chitons and boots, he missed his clear and sweet voice reading their favourite passages of The Iliad, he missed his soft hands caressing his temples when Alex's headaches were very strong, he missed his warmth along his body when they were resting together under the fur blankets, he missed his beautiful eyes, looking at him, he missed his clear laugh ... he missed HIM and everyday was like living in hell without his Phai by his side.

I miss you, my Phai, Alexander whispered between his tight lips, Come back to me soon, please.

Alexander threw himself onto his bed, which now seemed too big without his friend sharing it, and bitter tears fell from his eyes, wetting his pillow which by a caprice of Destiny still kept his Phai's smell. A hand came to soothe his grief and when he turned, round green eyes were looking at him, and a sweet voice started to sing a lullaby in order to bring him some comfort.

Mother, can you explain me why I feel my heart so heavy, why his eyes don't look for mine, why he is so far away, explain me WHY he got tired of me!

Shh... My son, he is not tired of you, he has just recognized which position he holds in your life and he is doing the wisest thing he could do: step aside so you can continue growing without the fear of hurting him when the time to take extreme decisions comes.

Extreme decisions? What are you talking about?

When you become a king, you will have to marry a woman, produce an heir, face many problems even plots against yourself, his injuries and his own death in the battlefield, ...

Stop, I don't want to listen to you saying those things, Hephaestion cares about me because I am Alexander and not because I am the Prince and king -to be. He is the most loyal person I have known in my whole life.

Your life is too young to reach to that kind of conclusion, but give it a thought and then tell me. Will you promise me to cheer you up? Without any further word, Olympias left the room and a very thoughtful son.

At the same time, Hephaestion was summoned to the king's chamber and was escorted by four armed guards. A very frightened youth stood opposite his king without daring to look at him into his only one eye.

What is the problem between you and my son, Amyntoros? Have you had a lover´s fight?

No, my king, Alex and I aren't lovers, just only good friends.

So why do you both reject each other's company and wander around the palace as ghosts in pain? You are under my care, Hephaestion, your father asked me in his deathbed to look after you as if you were my own son, but I can't take care of you if I don't know what is worrying you. Has Alexander been disrespectful with you? Alexander has a very quick tongue and can easily offend anybody without even noticing.

No, my Lord, it is that I am ... I don't know how to explain this ...

Speak with the truth or you will get lashed, boy.

I have strong feelings for Alexander but not all of them are based on knowledge, so I am ashamed and the only way I found to kill these unnatural feelings is to stay away from him till they die inside my heart and are replaced by purer feelings.

Stupid of you, Hephaestion, those feelings are not unnatural, they are not impure, they are the best feelings a man can have for another, because they are nurtured by love, care and loyalty. Do not worry my boy and let those feelings fill your heart with joy and peace.

Is that true, my King? Am I allowed to love Alexander without feeling guilty?

Yes, my boy. Haven't I told you the story of the Sacred Band of Thebes before?

No, my king, Will you please tell me?

OK, here we go. The great Theban commander Gorgidas had a very wise idea, he wanted to create an elite force in his army that would become invincible, because ...

Any army can have an invincible squad, that commander should know that, my lord.

Listen and learn, kid. These warriors were bond to one partner that should be protected even at the risk of losing their own life.

As Leonidas and his 300 Spartans at the Thermopile, our teacher had told us about his heroic battle 

and ...

What's the matter with you today? From the most stubborn silence to the most talkative mood ... A part from that, I don't think that Leonidas would appreciate your comparison due to his soldiers were not lovers.

LOVERS! My King, are you saying that those famous warriors are lovers?

Yes, the older Phoenicia or charioteers or lovers and the younger paraibatai or companion or beloved, I think I don't have to explain you this due to your previous Athenian teaching, but yes, the love between them is what has made them the most powerful force in Greece. They swear to protect and to die for the other, and if one of them is about to die because of his severe wounds, the other can honor him in two ways: die by his own hand and follow his beloved after death or continue living and go on fighting alone till death reunites them. Some are said to take another companion because not all of them are so strong to go into battle alone.

I would kill myself if HE were about to die ..., Hephaestion murmured in a very sad and low voice.

HE? Who is this HE? Have you chosen an eromenos for yourself, Hephaestion?

no, my king, I can't do it because I ... I ...

Because you love my son. May be I should find an erastes for you... I have had some offers, you know, you are handsome, your eyes and thighs are topic of conversation among my men, not only in the Cavalry but also in the Phalanx ...

Please, my King, don't do that! I wouldn't be able to be anybody´s else but HIS, even though I know that this would never happen. You shouldn't say a word about this to him, my lord, I ask you as your son, please.

Couldn't I say anything even if it is to soothe his despair?

I promise that I will do my best to be by his side again as soon as I can manage my feelings better ...

Try not to wait until Hades froze in Hell. Go boy, go and cheer up my son, it is even hard for me to see him so sad, and apart from that, somebody could easily take your place and comfort him while he is feeling so weak.

Seeing the horrified eyes of Hephaestion go as big as two gold coins, King Phillip knew he had hit a very powerful string, the string of jealously.

Hephaestion walked down the dark corridor and was about to go out of the palace when he heard his beloved weeps and sobs, he started to follow the sounds and found a weeping Alexander sitting under Hephaestion favourite peach tree and hugging his legs.

Alexander was so unhappy that he didn't recognize Hephaestion's footsteps, something that only he can do, and only dared to put his head up when a soft and caring hand was set on his temples to soothe the headache he was having in that moment. Alexander sighed loudly recognizing the loving touch of his friend but no words left his mouth. He kept his eyes closed and listened to Hephaestion's murmuring voice into his ear shell saying: **Soon, my love, soon**. Hephaestion left his side because he knew that if he stayed he would not be able to resist the temptation that was invading his body.

Alexander opened his eyes some minutes later to discover he was alone, more calm but alone.

-Oh, it was just a dream, he exclaimed with a sad voice, just a beautiful dream.

Hephaestion ran back to the barracks, crying and cursing himself for being so coward.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO.

Hephaestion woke up, brushed the sleep from his reddish eyes and decided to face the new day. How could he look at Xander in his eyes without revealing him his inner feelings? How could he go on living without his Xander by his side? Many questions troubled his soul and he had just woken up.

He put a new chiton on, combed his hair and tied it behind his nape, breathed deeply and went out of his room. He didn't meet Alexander on his way to the common dining room and he didn't see him there. He met his companions, who stopped to ask him how he was feeling. Telling them he was feeling better, he continued scanning the room looking for his friend. Cleitus saw him, came near and tapped him on his shoulder. Hephaestion was about to turn round to see who was touching him when he listened to a whisper in his ear:

- The one you are looking for is not here, that mommy's boy is still sleeping.

Laughing, he continued walking leaving an astonished Hephaestion in the middle of the room. That could not be true because Alexander was always up very early, if it was true, his Xander had to be ill. Fighting back his feelings which were about to cloud his mind, he decided to go to his classes without asking anybody about Alexander's well - being. It was a long day, hours ran very slowly and when the time to exercise their bodies came, he had no partner to be paired with. Cleitus took Alexander's place and fought with Hephaestion. By the end of the fight, Hephaestion was so battered that he could feel every bone in his body. Cleitus approached him and with a happy voice told him:

Now, beauty boy, you will have something else to think about than your lover.

Hephaestion dragged himself to his room and landed on his cotton. Even breathing was difficult and in that moment he realized how much he missed Alexander's ministrations on his wounds and his knowledge about medicine. That night again, Hephaestion missed dinner and Alexander felt more abandoned than the day before. He didn't know about the beating so he thought his Phai was avoiding him. Turning to Ptolemy, he asked him:

Has Hephaestion asked about me today?

Ptolemy put a sad face because he knew that his answer would hurt his friend.

No, he hasn't, but we didn't spend time together.

Cleitus approached the youths gathered in the dining room, as he approached Alexander, a full smile appeared on his face and with a funny voice he asked :

Have you seen to your lovers wounds? Was he still weeping about the beating I gave him this afternoon?

Alexander didn't answer to Cleitus but stared him back with an angry look and started to run towards the barracks.

Didn't he know about the beating? Hasn't anybody warned him? a nervous Cleitus asked the companions.

Alexander ran so fast that his lungs were about to explode, when he reached the barracks, a soft moan came to his ears and he knew his Phai was in real pain. Alexander sat on Phai's bed and put his hand on his forehead but Hephaestion brushed it away.

**- Don't touch me! I was beaten because of you!! I hate you!! Go away from me!! I don't want to talk to or see you again!! I always get hurt when I am near you!! **

Alexander felt his world falling down and his heart crashing into a thousand pieces.

He left his friend and promised himself no to care about him again.

Hephaestion spent the two following days getting over his beating, Cleitus was lashed with ten wipes because of his beating but the black general accepted it without complaining and then he went to give his apologies to the young companion. He asked Hephaestion if Alexander had tended to his wounds because the prince had miraculous hands. He only received a NO as an answer and then he added that he didn't want to talk or hear about Alexander again. Cleitus felt very guilty but he couldn't change the boys mind about that subject.

When Hephaestion got over, his pain had become wrath but his love for his Xander had become a deeper and greater love. He couldn't believe he had said those awful things to his beloved so he had 

only one thing to do: disappear from court and make everybody believe him dead.

He planned everything very carefully, he told his companions he wanted to be alone so he would stay two days in the near woods thinking. Cassander and Ptolemy offered to go with him but he refused them gently. He also told them he would take his sword and spear with him because he didn't want to be unarmed.

Hephaestion left very early the next morning without knowing that a pair of coloured eyes was following his slender frame. Alexander wanted to follow him and tried to sort things out, to tell him that he loved him but not as a friend would and that he wouldn't let him throw away all these years of true friendship. When he was about to follow, he gave the idea a second thought and decided to wait for his friends return.

Those two days went by very slowly and when the second evening sun was setting on the horizon, Alexander started to feel nervous as a bride who was about to marry. He kept looking at the palace gates to be the first to see his friend's arrival, but the evening turned into night, the god Sun was replaced by the moon and the stars in the sky and his beloved friend hadn't returned. He didn't want to go back to his chamber but Cleitus commanded him to go and rest, because the following day was going to be a very hard one.

Alexander instructed the guards to wake him up as soon as Hephaestion crossed the palace gates.

Morning came and a restless Alexander jumped off his bed, he went to the dining room and two pairs of eyes followed him, Ptolemy and Cassander didn't dare to ask about Hephaestion so they waited for Alexander to say something. The breakfast went on in silence and they were asked to join their commander for a full exercise with swords and horses.

Midday arrived and there were still no news from the Athenian boy, everybody was getting aware of Alexander's nervousness and his mood was getting darker with the pass of the hours.

Late evening arrived, new stars went out to accompany their moon and a lonely prince was asking them why his Phai was not by his side watching them.

Even king Phillip was getting worried and commanded Cleitus to organize some scouts to get the boy back in spite of being nearly dark. Hearing that, Alexander prepared himself for being part of the scout group and nobody dared to tell him that he couldn't go.

The search didn't take long because they were divided into five groups but it was Alexander's group that found what they didn't want to: a pond of blood, nearly dried, pieces of a bloodied chiton and Hephaestion's spear, broken in its middle, some tracks of fight but everybody knew what it meant all together.

Alexander fell on his knees, hugging the bloodied chiton against his heart but not a single word came out of his mouth. Hephaestion can't be dead, Alexander thought, he can't leave me alone in this world, how I am supposed to go on without him, he wondered.

He rose, got on Bucephalus and rode away. He entered his chamber, threw on his bed with Phai´s chiton in his hands and cried as if it weren't tomorrow. He cried for hours, he didn't let anybody enter his room, he didn't take food or drink and when the third day arrived, another Alexander appeared in the dining room. His face was now like sculpted in stone, his eyes had lost their brightness and a white lock of hair appeared on his left temple in the shape of a half moon. This strange lock was very noticeable because Alexander had cut his long hair as a sign of mourning as Achilles did for his beloved Patroclus. Nobody dared to ask about it but later that day, a seer asked to talk to king Philip because she had had a vision that intrigued her and asked him if he had seen something unusual about his son.

Philip told her about the white lock and she explained him that the white lock symbolized his son´s love for Hephaestion because he was the moon to his sun, Alexander, adding that the goddess Aphrodite had to be behind that lock. She also told him that Alex would mourn Phae all his life because they were meant to be together and something strange had happened to tear them apart.

Alexander remained in silence for a whole week, he participated in all the drills and classes but nobody, not even his parents, asked him a thing.

One night, a solitary Alex was about to prepare a small pyre to burn his lover´s chiton when a strange feeling invaded his heart and he could listen to a woman's voice asking him why he would cry for his lover when he was alive. Alexander couldn't understand what the voice was saying so Aphrodite appeared in all her glory and talked to Alexander in her tender voice:

My dear prince, why are you so unhappy? Why are you preparing the pyre for your lover?

My dearest goddess, you know why my heart weeps, my best half has abandoned me and left me alone, I am not strong enough to follow by myself, my Phai was not my lover, I didn't have time to show him my true feelings and ask him to be my beloved.

I think he knew how difficult is to love a prince or a king, because of that he left you enough place for you to move on.

But I can't without him, he was everything to me, life doesn't have any sense without him, a weeping Alexander looked at the goddess showing his angst.

Aphrodite was so sad that she promised to help him with some magic but he would have to make something in return for her. Alexander told her that he would do even the impossible to get his Phai back. She explained him that his white lock of hair was a symbol for his lover and that it would help him to be together again. Alexander didn't understand very well but he accepted her explanation. He went back to his chamber feeling a bit more relaxed.

A new beginning was about to start.


	3. Chapter 3

Title: The Sacred Band.

Author: toobeauty

Rating: PG-13 for the story

Pairing: Alexander/ Hephaestion.

Chapters: 3 of …….

Reviews: Please!!

No beta so all mistakes are mine.

In the meantime, a brunette soldier made his way to an unknown land, not so much unknown but he knew that his life would be very hard from the very moment he left his Xander.

He wandered without too much direction but he knew that Thebes was still far away.

His journey into his new life took him two months, sometimes he went walking, and sometimes he was taken on someone's horse, but always missing his own war stallion.

Finally, the gates of Thebes were opened to him and he requested an audience with Gorgidas. The Theban commander listened to his story and told him that he had to think about his request. Gorgidas was astonished by Hephaestion´s love for his lover and by his beauty; he had received news of a beautiful young Athenian who was Alexander's beloved, his better half and that his eyes were as blue as the Mediterranean Sea or a clear summer sky. Some of his soldiers had asked him leave to kidnap the young soldier and turned him into a weapon against Alexander, but Gorgidas was a romantic and he wouldn't dare do that to that boy even though he was his enemy. Apart from that, one night Aphrodite had come to him in a dream and asked him to leave the boy with his lover because if he didn't he would suffer her wrath, because Hephaestion was her protégée.

Hephaestion came back the next day to get his answer and he was extremely glad to be accepted in the Sacred Band. He was introduced to his prospective brothers in arms and since that moment he received lots of propositions to become their eromenos. Hephaestion declined every proposition very gently and explained that he had a beloved and had lost him in battle so now the only thing he wanted to do was to honour him till death bring them together again. That simple and strong vow of love gained the respect of his companions and never again was he bothered about that.

Everybody could see that his love was great and that even after death, he continued loving and honoring him with his daily sacrifices to Aphrodite.

Gorgidas was confused with Hephaestions story because he knew that Alexander of Macedon was still alive but he didn't ask the young man about that.

Six months had run since the last time Hephaestion saw his Xander and everyday was harder than the day before; he tired himself with his exercises to fool his heart and mind but anything was totally effective. Xander appeared in his dreams, in his thoughts almost every night; his memories were always tender but painful.

I must find another one to turn my love to; I must do it in spite of not wanting because if I don't do it, I will go mad, Hephaestion whispered.

Don't push yourself to do something that can turn against yourself, because then it will be more difficult to be undone, Gorgidas said in a fatherly voice.

I know but my heart is tearing apart every day I am without him.

Be calm and peace will set in your heart again. Don't rush into things.

I will follow your advice even though I know I won't find peace.

Alexander went on living as if every day were the last day of his life, he was ok but never cheerful, he participated with his friends in the banquets but never took anybody in his couch because Hephaestion was the only one to share it. Once Cassander tried to sit there but he got such a cold and deadly look that even the most courageous warrior would be afraid of it.

Hephaestion´s name was never mentioned but everybody knew that the boy was still in their prince´s heart and would stay there forever.

One night of bright stars and a full moon found the Macedonian prince out in the garden, the one his Phai liked more because it had been there where they met their first time. Alexander was looking at the blue sky that reminded him of his lover's eyes when a bright warm light wrapped him and a sweet voice told him to listen carefully because she had found a solution to his problem.

My dear Prince, it is time I give you my gift: you must go to Thebes and you will find your beloved because he is now serving under Gorgidas. Go to him and conquer him, then you will be able to bring him back where he belongs.

But my goddess, everything is the same; he will tell me that he cannot love me because I am the king to be.

How do you know that?

My father told me about a conversation he had with Hephaestion some days before his "death" and he admitted he loved me but that his love was not as pure as Aristotle had taught us it should be.

My good Hephaestion, always so noble; there I have another good reason to help you get reunited.

I told you about the white lock, it has the power to change your physical appearance so in that way, you will be able to look for him and he won't realize who you are. so, my beautiful Prince, go to Thebes as quick as a lightning, make him fall in love with you again and bring him home because you two were born to be, live and die together.

Ok, but how does it work?

Whenever you want the change, you should comb that lock twice back and your appearance will change; you would be as handsome as you are now but with a different colour hair and your eyes will have the same colour, your frame will be slender and your voice softer but not girlish.

But, will Hephaestion love me in this new body?

Yes, because your essence – the real you – will remain the same as your love for him. If I know my Hephaestion well, he will try to resist your advances because he will think he is betraying you, but if you want to win him back, you will have to break his barriers always remembering to be kind and loving because as you really know, your Phai is a very sensitive young man and his heart is easily hurt, so love him tender

Everything is clear but how will I get to Thebes? Even my father was trained in his youth by some of the members of the Sacred Band; he doesn't like the city after its riot.

Hypnos, the god of dreams, will whisper King Phillip to send you to a city near Thebes to settle down a fort to strengthen his power in the area.

In that way, I will be able to come and go between the two cities without being discovered.

That's right, my prince, so be ready to depart in two days, your happiness is round the corner, don't let her escape again!

I won't. Now my sweet goddess, what is your request?

I will ask you in due time, do not worry now about that.

Saying that, she brushed her lips on Alexander's eyes and gave him a hint of the happiness to come.

TBC


End file.
